tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post6095288742432024576..comments2023-09-01T07:29:17.454-04:00Comments on [un]Common Sense: The Friday Sex Blog [Escape from Intimacy]Eddiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09579585545543464648noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-90670088389170630022011-02-20T23:57:50.000-05:002011-02-20T23:57:50.000-05:00Huh? You're being arouses sexually, having sex...Huh? You're being arouses sexually, having sexual fantasies, and that's not sexual? Sorry, but how do you think a boyfriend or a husband would feel about such intimacies?Eddienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-33729770436688921162011-02-20T14:50:42.000-05:002011-02-20T14:50:42.000-05:00It is if you are not fully there mentally!It is if you are not fully there mentally!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-30705735253621152172011-02-20T14:08:50.000-05:002011-02-20T14:08:50.000-05:00<span>Well of course it is! When I go to th...<span>Well of course it is! When I go to the massage therapist we are not having sex! Intimacy, even physical intimacy, is not, in my humble opinion, the same thing as sex!<br /></span>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-25545204781270553992011-02-20T14:07:23.000-05:002011-02-20T14:07:23.000-05:00Well of course it is! Well of course it is! Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-33058918674640138152011-02-13T10:33:37.000-05:002011-02-13T10:33:37.000-05:00LOL! Still, sex isn't just penetration.LOL! Still, sex isn't just penetration.Eddienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-82378593343339536732011-02-13T06:48:55.000-05:002011-02-13T06:48:55.000-05:00I feel very comfortable with him. He knows that a...I feel very comfortable with him. He knows that all I think about is sex so I did not have to tell him. LOL.Keep Poking!noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-39979934994193746402011-02-12T09:31:18.000-05:002011-02-12T09:31:18.000-05:00Poking: I find it interesting that you didn't ...Poking: I find it interesting that you didn't consider your "massage" encountor sex. You just described a proundly sexual experience. Also, imn terms of intimacy. did HE know what you were feeling? Does he know NOW?Eddienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-73056150815394087962011-02-12T09:29:03.000-05:002011-02-12T09:29:03.000-05:00Connie: My personal opinion is that there is no su...Connie: My personal opinion is that there is no such thing as sex without intimacy. The act itself forces at least some form of intimacy whether we recognize it or not. I believe the issue is the degree of intimacy. Many people see "intimacy" in narrow terms -- the profound kind. But true intimacy starts somewhere. It's a symbiotic evolution.<br /><br />I think part of the answer to your question lies in how you define sex.Eddienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-61419992212100710062011-02-12T09:18:33.000-05:002011-02-12T09:18:33.000-05:00A lot of intimacy or a lot of sex? Hmm! I had a ...A lot of intimacy or a lot of sex? Hmm! I had a crush on someone for many years. I felt that that person was out of reach for me. When he asked me to give him a massage (though I am no massage therapist) I was scared and excited! I thought for sure that this would lead to the fulfillment of the curiosity I had about him. <br /><br />We went to his apartment and he asked me to come into his bedroom so he could lay comfortably. I told him that I would be more comfortable in the living room. Touching him was pure excitement (titilation?) Anyway. After a while I was comfortable that he was not going to rape me (LOL) and I consented to go to his room for the therapy.<br /><br />Touching him was interesting! I just wanted to feel his soft skin and look at his tone body; but, I was not there for that. My job was to relieve his body of the pain that rested in his muscles and in his digestive system. <br /><br />Once I let go of the desire to have sex I could open myself up to making him feel good. I had to think back in time to when I learned to massage myself. I had to clear my mind and focus on my breath so that I could channel that skill and use it for good for another. <br /><br />Talk about intimate moments with him. It never led to sex. But, the intimacy of one breath at a time losing my "self". The unselfishness of that moment taught me a form of intimacy that was very powerful. I never knew that with anyone else. I always equated intimacy WITH sex.<br /><br />I get sex somewhere else of course. And, it is neither good nor bad. They may never meet in one person. Do they need to? Letting go of the expectations and finding that intimacy does not have to lead to control or owning another. That is really freeing for me. If I found both in one person that would be wonderful.Keep Poking!noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6553815707336774090.post-85464558650030908842011-02-11T13:07:35.000-05:002011-02-11T13:07:35.000-05:00Interesting and thought-provoking post, as usual, ...Interesting and thought-provoking post, as usual, Eddie. I'm curious about what your perspective is on something: While it's healthy in any relationship to work to bridge the gap between sex and intimacy (sadly, the two are often mutually exclusive), other times it's even beneficial to forgo the effort ("Sometimes--in fact, a lot of the time--you have to <i>fuck."</i>Connie C. Rasberrynoreply@blogger.com