Friday, October 31, 2008

The TGIF Sex Blog [Sexual Positions]

¡Hola! Everybody…
You know? I am so sick of people coming to the defense of Sarah Palin. It’s as if we don’t want to hold people accountable any more. What? We can’t point out the fact that she couldn’t name a Supreme Court case, or a newspaper she reads regularly? Is it negative to note she had no clue as to the meaning of the “Bush Doctrine”? I’m simply flabbergasted that some people are angry about this and try to paint Palin as a victim of the “libruhl” media.

Give me a fuckin break!

BTW, Does Joe (who’s not really a “Joe”) the Plumber (who’s not really a plumber) have a real job?

::blank stare::

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-=[ Sexual Positions ]=-

The Kama Sutra Fallacy

[Note: if you’re easily offended by graphic sexual images and discussions, you really shouldn’t be reading this. If you take exception to this, please feel free to delete me or to ignore my Friday posts, which are dedicated to things sexual]

In a twelfth-century love manual, an Indian sage describes 32 different sexual positions (which he lovingly called “internal enjoyments”). These 32 positions don’t come close to covering all the possibilities. There has been a long and ancient tradition -- from old Sanskrit erotic literature, Ovid, and the sex sages of Arabia -- of attempting to determine the total number of possible positions for human sexual intercourse. The potential is, needless to say, mind-boggling. One sexologist actually counted a shocking 529.

Not that it matters. The whole practice of counting sexual positions, sometimes called the kama sutra fallacy, is a useless pastime. What really matters here is that we all tend to fall into boring sexual routines, and braking out of them, exploring sexual frontiers, is usually a good idea.

Let’s a take a short tour…

The Missionary Position

There are probably a few people left who still believe that the missionary position (face-to-face, man on top) is the only right and true position for sexual intercourse, though it’s rarely ever depicted in ancient erotic art. (As a side note, the oldest known painting of human sexual intercourse, dating back to 3200 bce, depicts a woman on top.) In fact, in some cultures, this position is considered peculiar. Anthropologist Manilowski described how some Trobriand Islanders, perhaps precursors to late-night TV comedians, would gather around the campfire and mimic the positions used by missionaries causing their friends to howl with laughter.

The missionary position is certainly the most common one in our culture, as the late Dr. Kinsey discovered in his monumental sex surveys of the 1940s and 1950s. He estimated that as much as 70 percent of the U.S. population may never have tried intercourse any other way. And this position does have some advantages.

Some psychologists point out, for example, that there are times when a man likes to dominate a woman; there are times that women like to be “taken” by a man. The missionary position facilitates the fulfillment of this domination/ surrender need. In addition, if the goal is pregnancy, this position renders the vagina like an upright cup, increasing the chances of retaining semen.

But the position has some major drawbacks…

It’s the worst possible position for the male because he is supporting his weight with his smallest, weakest muscles and leads to early fatigue. In addition, if the he is a lot heavier than she is, he tends to squash her. In addition, because he’s using his hands to support himself, he can’t directly stimulate her clitoris.

Women, however, suffer the biggest disadvantage of the missionary position because the clitoris is only indirectly (if at all) by the penis, making it difficult for women to reach orgasm. The Hite Report reported that of 1,844 women surveyed, only 30 percent reported regularly reaching orgasm during intercourse -- in large part because of the popularity of the missionary position.

The Coital Alignment Technique

For most women, the key to orgasm is clitoral stimulation. One way of overcoming the lack of clitoral stimulation is to employ the coital alignment technique.

Instead of entering her straight on when using the missionary position, the man “rides high,” so that his pubic bone is applying pressure directly to her mons (the fatty bulge above her vagina, beneath which lies the clitoris). By settling into a gentle, mutual rhythm in which he rocks back and forth over her clitoris, rather than just focusing on thrusting, she gets stimulation where she most needs it (I once wrote a blog describing a rotational form of intercourse that helps tremendously in this area).

Women who learn the coital alignment technique, report being able to reach orgasm more often and more pleasurably, and are more likely to climax simultaneously with their partner. The important part is to keep continuous and steady pressure on the clitoris.

Woman on Top

But you can skip the missionary position altogether and let the woman get on top. Some people feel a cultural barrier for the woman to be in the “superior” position, that it’s an affront to a man’s authority or suggests some latent homosexuality, or some other nonsense.

Get over it.

It’s pleasure that should be in the superior position. Generally speaking, the woman on top (“yee-haw!”) position allows her to fine-tune the stimulation of her clitoris and in that way, more easily achieve orgasm. Only the female on top and lateral (side-by-side) coital positions allow direct stimulation of the clitoris easily. Masters and Johnson state that the clitoral response develops more rapidly and with greater intensity with the woman on top position than in any other female position. Which is a rather stuffy way of saying that it helps a woman get to where she wants to go (“ride ‘em cowgirl!”)

Side by Side

Making love while the man and woman are lying face to face and side y side is sometimes called the African position because it is widely practiced there. It has several advantages: It’s less strenuous for both partners. It especially helpful when either partner is sick or debilitated. It’s also useful during the last weeks of pregnancy. And like the woman on top position, it helps men lat longer than the missionary position.

Rear Entry

Rear entry, or the “Doggie Style,” is my preferred sexual position because I have such a great appreciation for a woman’s behind. In this position, I am able to enjoy the esthetically pleasing curves of a woman’s ass, smell her muskiness, and actually see my penis in the act of penetration -- all sexually exciting for me. Rear entry is also a little raunchy and animalistic, points that are also sexually appealing to me.

In addition, rear entry offers many benefits. It’s the position, for example where penetration is deepest and women who have an erotically sensitive “G-spot” say that it’s most easily reached when the man enters from behind. Also, the rear position frees my hands to stimulate and caress the other parts of a woman, such as her clitoris or her breasts (and I can slap that ass, and yank on the hair, while yelling out “Who’s yo daddy!” too! LOL!)

The Oceanic Position

In terms maximizing the greatest sensual pleasure, the Oceanic position, is considered the best. It’s also a position most people in our culture can’t perform because, as chair sitters, we would find it terribly uncomfortable. In this position, the woman lies on her back with her knees raised and the man enters her while squatting between her legs, like a baseball catcher.

Another variation is practiced in the Truk Islands of Micronesia. The man sits on the ground with his legs wide open and stretched out in front of him. The woman faces him, kneeling. The man places the head of his penis just inside of the opening of her vagina. He does not really insert it, but moves the penis up and down with his hand in order to stimulate her clitoris. As the couple reach climax, the man draws the woman toward him and completes the insertion of the penis.

I didn’t get into the sitting and standing positions, but suffice it to say that in order for sex not to get routine or stale, it’s important to experiment and explore your sexual horizons with your partner.

Love,

Eddie

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