Hola
mi Gente,
This
might sound like a strange thing to express, but I am more interested in
responses when we are challenged to move out of our collective zones, than
opinions hurled from within our cocoons of social conditioning.
* * *
Catherine Deneuve and David Bowie in The Hunger |
The Hunger
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter
whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism.
-- C. G. Jung, Memories,
Dreams, Reflections, chapter 12 (1963)
The other day I was reading a short
story, The
Bound Man, by the German author Ilse Aichinger. It is a beautiful piece
in the existentialist tradition: A man awakens one morning to find himself
inexplicably bound by rope. The story takes a strange turn because instead of
removing the rope at his first opportunity, as you would expect him to do, he
decides to remain bound and become a circus attraction, turning his strange and
accidental bondage into his trademark work.
Strange, huh?
You might ask why would a person happily
accept such bondage? It is a question similar to the one posed by Franz Kafka
in The
Hunger Artist, in which a man who also chooses to become a circus
attraction starves himself to death because he cannot find food that interests
him.
These two authors are asking a
variation of the same question: “Why would people carelessly, inexplicably, and
even happily do things that bring them so much harm and suffering”?
Addiction is the same kind of bondage.
Addicts cling to their addictions, and nothing you do or say will pry them away
from their alcohol, cocaine, tobacco, internet surfing, video-game playing,
overeating, shopping, or sexual escapades. It doesn’t matter if you tell them
they are dying. It doesn’t matter if you tell them that they’re wasting half their
life in front of a computer screen or in the aisles of department stores. Point
out to them that they cannot have real love or a real life if they use sex as a
drug, it doesn’t matter. Show them that their liver is already not functioning,
that their nasal lining is already perforated, or that their lungs are black,
and still it won’t matter. What you experience when you talk to an addict is
that he or she is unable to understand or is completely indifferent to your
reasoning.
I know, because I was an active addict
for a substantial part of my adult life. And it is not an issue of will power
or lack thereof. At the worst part of my addiction, I used to wake up penniless
and at the end of the day manage to spend $300 feeding my addiction. I would
submit that took a lot of will.
I operate from the assumption that we
live in an addictive society -- it is how we are all conditioned. We live in a
consumer-based society in which the wanting and getting is the be-all and
end-all of our existence. We are all would-be addicts, given the right
circumstances of biology, psychology, and social setting. Some of us, because
we are more at risk (such as myself), become full-blown addicts, and cross over
into that downward spiral of obsession morphing into compulsion and suffering.
Even if we don’t succumb to addiction,
we sometimes feel a significant loss of control in some area of our life and
experience difficulty maintaining a healthy weight, avoiding hours of internet
surfing, quieting our anxious thoughts, or staying on track with our goals. In
order to deal with these challenges, we need to recover: that is, we
need to embrace a way of being that recognizes and addresses our addictive
nature and our potential problems.
If you don’t, you just might wake up
one morning bound head to foot with rope and say to yourself, “How interesting!
I think I’ll become a circus attraction!”
My name is Eddie and I’m in recovery
from civilization…
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